As you all know I went for my scope yesterday. The good news is they didn't find anything because of course I wasn't bleeding yesterday. The bad news is they didn't find anything. LOL. There were no growths or broken blood vessels seen. However, now we still have no idea what was causing it. My parents asked if it could do with stress and he said absolutely not. So the doctor told my parents that if I started bleeding again to call him and they would do another scope that day. For now though that is something else I can cross off my worry list. Again the power of prayer and God are at work in my life.
As for how I am doing today. I know it is hard to put into words, but I am at peace with everything that has happened. I am settling into my new life and actually loving it. I am OK with being a single parent and not having a man in my life. My parents have told me that they are beginning to see the happy person in me they haven't seen in years. They say I seem more relaxed and happy. I did begin to decorate for Christmas yesterday, but I am keeping it simple in case I need to move out in a hurry. Yes, I am giving him MY home that I love. I just can't afford it and I think I would like to move to a smaller more affordable place. Anyway, I have forgiven him and and am being the bigger person and not saying harsh things to him other than I would like to see him start giving me a little money to help support our son. This of course is making him angry and he is lashing out and now trying to say I was having an affair before he left me, which is very untrue. He is also saying very hurtful things about the last 9 nine years we were married which again are untrue. But you know I am letting the comments roll off and not falling into his bitterness, anger, and emotionally controlling ways (yes my counselor pointed this out). He doesn't understand why I am not more upset about this whole thing. You know all I can say is I don't know, but I do know that I am happier with the way things are now. When I see him I feel pity and sorrow and nothing else. I know this is weird, but I don't even feel any type of love for him at all even if he did give me our son. Anyway, I am at work so I better get busy.
Sounds like you're going to be just fine. About the house, that was an old dream , time for new ones.
ReplyDeleteThank God the docs didn't find anything wrong, I dont know if i agree about the stress not causing it. I am by far no doctor, but i do know the body does strange things when stressed! I love your positive attitude Mary, Keep moving forward! Just look at a new place to live as a new decorating adventure! Hugs and Blessings
ReplyDeleteway to go....Stay positive.Hugs
ReplyDeleteThat's wonderful news all around Mary. I think that it is great that you are feeling happy.......
ReplyDeleteMary it is so good you are feeling peace and that they didn't find anything abnormal. What blessings to take into the Holiday season.
ReplyDeleteWhere ever you end up living, it will be a new start and it will be just perfect - because it will be yours!
I'm so glad you are gonna be ok. A new place? A new decorating adventure! You will make it special Anywhere you are in this world you can make it a home if you just add the things that make it you. Hugs! ~Beth~
ReplyDeleteKeep up the good attitude, dear...and may your EX soon come to his rational side of his brain, if he even HAS one, and maybe REMEMBER that whether you had an affair, yesterday, last year, or never, has NOTHING to do with SUPPORTING HIS CHILD...the CHILDREN come FIRST, and his simple-minded ways take the back seat, if he can only GROW out of his diapers long enough to realize this!
ReplyDeleteI am glad and sad, like you, to know there was nothing found on your test, but at the same time, I take the old adage to heart that says, No News Is Good News!
So chinny up, and stay healthy...
Mary - you are going to be just fine. I'm so thrilled that the Dr didn't find anything. And I agree that stress can do terrible thing to the human body.
ReplyDeleteStay strong, keep the faith and remember that a new place is a new life. Look at it as a chance to start over completely and fresh.
Take care!
Good news all around.
ReplyDeleteHave a wonderful weekend, janie
Mary, I'm so glad the doctors didn't find anything abnormal & I hope the bleeding is done. I love your positive attitude. It's so amazing how things turn out. Enjoy your weekend.
ReplyDeletePam
I hope your Dr can find the cause eventually, so you can rest about your health, but as for the rest of what is happening in your life, you are amazing!! Good for you...stay positive and start afresh and build a new life for you and your children.
ReplyDeleteluv Ann.xx
mary, have they thought about a
ReplyDeleted&c?? maybe that might help with the bleeding. i dont know.,
i am so glad you are at peace.
this is the first step of getting back to you. i know it may see difficult to think about moving.... i would postpone that as long as possible. first, since you are going through a divorce he has to give you some time. like about 3-6 months to move out... thats probably not what he wants but too bad. i am glad you are being civil with him. and yes, he needs to be helping care for HIS child. ya know, its ironic that he wants to throw dirt on you now and be so sarcastic..... thats how my ex is/was. they made their bed, maybe now its not that easy lying in it.
okay, now we want to see some projects you are working on. you never ever cease to amaze me with your primitives.
hugs, kim
Glad to hear things seems to be getting better for you. Sounds like the MD needs to do the scope when you are having blood in your urine.
ReplyDeleteEnjoy the good weather we are having here.
And all the good Christmas events we have going on here in this county,
Hubby and I hope to go
see the Festival of Trees
at the historical society
here and its is free.
From Wooster OH
Mary, I hope your health problems stay gone for good, one less thing to worry over! Just take good care of yourself and your kids! Karen
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like you've regained your footing, and he doesn't like it! Good for you - glad things are okay on the health front.
ReplyDeleteHe should be helping you support his child - see a lawyer if you can. And I'm so glad you're doing better!
Terri
I'm so glad that no problems were found during your scope. I hope the bleeding doesn't return.
ReplyDeleteI'm also glad ot hear that you are coping so much better.
He sounds like a control freak, and also trying to control and manipualte your feelings. I'm so glad that you are not allowing him to do that. I'm sure it is making him furious. As for the child support, he has to do that no matter if he likes it or not.
Take care! Many happy days are coming your way, sweet friend!
I'm so glad that you seem to be doing better physically and in other areas as well.
ReplyDeletePraying many blessings over you and your family right now.
T
I'm so glad that things are going better. I definitely would not let him get to you...what he's doing is very childish.
ReplyDeleteTake care Mary!
Hugz,
Michele
It sounds like healing is in process--so happy for you. Glad things are going better for you. Have a great day. Julie
ReplyDeleteMary dear,
ReplyDeleteGlad to hear that nothing was found! Hopefully, everything will just go away!! (the power of prayer!!)
As for Ex, I am sorry he is being a poo. And really happy to hear that counseling is helping you my dear!! Just remember we love you!! The wonderfully beautiful lady that you are!! Welcome back dear! :D
I hope your having a wonderfully blessed day dear! :D
I am glad you are feeling better! I realized after my divorce just how happy I could be. The kids too. No more fussing and fighting! I understand your child support need too! I just went to court with my ex yesterday to order child support. It ticked him off and I had been putting it off, but it is his responsibility too and I had to do what is best for the kids. Bottom line.
ReplyDeleteKeep your head up girl!
Mary,
ReplyDeleteI am glad you are finally getting peace.I see the old you coming back!I can hear it in your post! I am keeping you in my prayers. Have a blessed day!
Juanita